Christmas is a joyous time of the year for many reasons but the most important reason of all is that it is the celebration of the birth of our Saviour and Lord, Jesus Christ. As it says in Matthew 1:23, “Behold, a virgin shall be with child, and shall bring forth a son, and we shall call his name Emmanuel, which means God with us.”
I’ll bet all of you have had some wonderful Christmas seasons, and if you have lived long enough, maybe some that were not so good. The word tells us in Ecclesiastes 3:1 that “To everything there is a season, and a time to every purpose unto heaven: A time to be born, and a time to die, a time to weep and a time to laugh; a time to mourn and a time to dance. If we are truthful, we know that Christmas seasons are like this, not always perfect the way we dreamed and anticipated they would be.
C.S. Lewis said, “Happiness comes from a combination of memories and anticipation.” Some people would probably say that Christmas just makes them feel overwhelmed. A lot of those feelings come from a change in Christmas traditions from minimal to decorating everything, we adorn our bodies, cars, home, and yard and nothing is “over the top.” When I think back over the years there are many Christmas symbols that I remember that take me to a place of family happiness and worship to God. I loved the Christmas music that I heard on TV, radio, at the stores, and especially the church and choir music. We had a small nativity scene at my house (probably from the dime store) that glistened with glitter. It reminded me of the Christmas carol “Away in a Manger” and Luke 2:7, “And she brought forth her firstborn son, and wrapped him in swaddling clothes, and laid him in a manger, because there was no room for them in the inn.” Of course, there was always a star at the top of our real Christmas tree or sometimes our tree could be flocked with fake snow or the tree could be made of silver foil.. That star reminded me of Matthew 2:2, “Where is he that is born King of the Jews? For we have seen his star in the east, and are come to worship him.” We had a pair of “kissing angels” that I loved to play with reminding me of Luke 2:10, “And the angel said unto them, Fear not: for behold, I bring you good tidings of great joy, which shall be to all people” and also reminding me of the carol “Angels We Have Heard on High.” Then I remember so many of the secular aspects of the holiday, the presents, the food (especially of the fruitcake my grandmother used to make, unlike today’s which are used for re-gifting or a doorstop) and the times we would have hot chocolate (made from scratch, there were no mixes). Also Christmas cards from friends and relatives, the beautiful lights, the individual toys or presents I received, the stockings, recognizing special ornaments on the tree as we decorated, and on some rare occasions, snow. I treasure the stories my parents would tell us about Christmas when they were young when they received only an apple, an orange, a few nuts, and maybe a small toy. I remember I used to complain about my daddy because he always wore the same red sweater vest every year, I would give anything to see him now in that red sweater just one more time. Don’t underestimate what Christmas traditions can mean, holidays are part of the very essence of family life. Older people usually like Christmas traditions to be the way they were always done while they were growing up. We find comfort in doing as we always have like writing a letter and putting a stamp on an envelope instead of sending an e-mail or following an old trusted recipe for comfort food instead of a new one. Why do we need to go back and remember these things? As Christians, the past always strengthens our faith. Sometimes we don’t understand why we go through some of the things we do, but when we look back, we see how the Lord was there and helped us. This gives us faith for our future.
When evaluating Christmas seasons, we usually end up with a balance of the happy and the sad. I hope that you are not a person who never had any good Christmas memories growing up. Holidays can be over-rated and sad, especially Christmas. In fact, since my topic is Christmas past, I would like to read to you a story I wrote three years ago entitled “It’s Still Christmas.” Here it is from the beginning:
Every year at Christmas my family and I go through the same process. Because of the fact that we lost my husband and the rest of my family’s father in December six years ago, and we lost my daughter Vanessa a few years before that, our first thoughts about Christmas are for self-preservation. When you lose both a daughter and sister and then a few years later a husband and father it can be devastating to a family. How do we get through the holidays with the least amount of pain and sorrow? Most Christmases we went on a trip as a family or change our Christmas routine somewhat so it would not be like it was when they were here with us. We have found that nostalgic Christmases just magnify the fact that they are gone and makes us sadder still. Granted, we are all doing well with our grief but we all feel it is unhealthy to dwell on the things that are sad and that we should do something to help the situation if we can. Christmas is supposed to be the holiday to end all holidays in its perfection for the family. Commercial advertisements squeeze every ounce of nostalgia out of people in order to get us to purchase things to replicate our remembrances of Christmases past. Christmas songs like “Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas”, “I’ll be Home for Christmas”, and Elvis’ “It Will be a Blue Christmas Without You”’ although meaningful in context, can bring your emotions way down in no time. Commercials that show the perfect families Christmas dinners, Christmas homes with a twinkling tree inside and snow all around, with little children opening presents during happy times can add to our depression.
We can’t depend on the world’s perspectives on things for truth, but we can depend on God’s. The sweet perspective he gave me for Christmas this year(which was 2015)is worth sharing and I would like to continue by sharing it with you.
I make it a point never to say anything about December 21 being my husband’s day of death, but, of course, it is never a joyous occasion, although I am joyous he is in heaven. I think because Jesus always provides for the widows, that if we look for his comfort, he always gives it as he says in James 1:27—“Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress.”
During the month of December of that year I was asked to teach a Sunday School Class to adults. I found a wonderful book about advent and was using it to teach the class and it helped me immensely to study it and to share it with others. The particular class I was teaching was older people and I had already noticed how connected they were, and how they helped each other continually. There was a lady in the class whose husband had been very ill and the wife was his main caretaker. The couple had been helped by the class financially.
The third Sunday in December that I came into the class to teach was the anniversary of the day Charley, my husband died. I think it was providential that the name of my lesson was “The Magi’s Journey from Disappointment to True Treasure.” I had begun my teaching, when that same couple came in to the Sunday School class. The wife was pushing her husband in a wheelchair, and even though it was obvious that the man had been very sick by the way his clothes just hung on his body, he had a chipper look on his face as he greeted all of his friends. Everyone greeted them with such love! Then, hidden away in his wheelchair, the wife began to take out plates of cookies and treats as a thank you for the financial assistance the class had given them. It was a beautiful scene that I was privileged to witness. As I looked around the room at all the smiles, I could see another man smiling even though attached to his leg was a catheter bag. He would probably be embarrassed if he knew I had recognized it, but it was amazing to me that he has his own physical problems yet he was so delighted his friend was better. He was also a widower. I had come into this class to teach these people, but they had taught me. Jesus whispered to me at that moment, “See Gwen, it’s still Christmas, here it is in front of you.”
That afternoon after I had returned from church, I heard a knock at the door, and there was one of my best friends who co-teaches with me at my Bible Study, She didn’t know what day it was for me either, she was just bringing me a Christmas gift, but it made my day. Again Jesus whispered, “I have not forgotten you in this day Gwen. Here is another gift for you because it is still Christmas.”
Later on in the day as it began to get dark I began to thank the Lord for getting me through the day so wonderfully. All of a sudden I began to hear singing. I looked out the window and thought to myself, “Carolers, how nice.” The doorbell rang and I opened it to see one of the members from my Bible Study group. She said “Gwen, my family is here vacationing and we are here to sing Christmas carols to you. She didn’t know what day it was for me either but Jesus did. She took me out to her family and lovingly introduced me to all of them as her Bible Study teacher. I stood there on the street with the Christmas lights twinkling all around me with tears of joy rolling down my cheeks. Jesus was sent to earth to comfort those in need and heal the broken hearted. He had blessed me so much that day, he had really given me a peace that passes all understanding. And best of all, Christmas can still take place in our hearts, no matter what the circumstances in our lives. I had learned my lesson which was Gwen’s Journey From Disappointment to True Treasure.
Now, years later(here in 2018), you know what Jesus is whispering in my ear about this Christmas season? “Gwen, it’s now time to dance on your sorrow, for I have truly turned your sorrow to joy.” Remember Ecclesiastes 3, “A time to weep, and a time to laugh: a time to mourn, and a time to dance.” I had been able to find joy again, with the help of Jesus, and to leave my grief behind. Jesus will do this for you too.
There are some practical things you can do as well if you find yourself in a season of acute grief because of a loss of some kind, you might want to change your traditions for a season or take a trip. If your financial situation won’t allow this maybe you could just join another family for Christmas and not have to worry about any of the decorations or food for once. People will understand. Or you could help others this Christmas, serve food for a Christmas dinner for the homeless, or help some children who won’t be having Christmas without help. Galatians 5:13 says, “ by love serve one another.” I found this to be one of the most helpful things in grief, when you begin to feel sorry for yourself, go help someone else in need. If you look around you you can always find someone else who is worse off than you are. Don’t be miserable. Suffering is a part of life but misery is a choice. There are many promises from the Bible that suffering is only for a time and then joy comes again. Ezekiel 11:19,20:”And I will give you one heart, and I will put a new spirit within you; and I will take the stony heart out of your flesh. That you may walk in my ways, and keep my commands, and do them: and you shall be my people and I will be your God.” Romans 5:3 says, “We also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance character; and character, hope.” Realize good seasons will come again.
One last nugget about Christmas past is learn to simplify and concentrate on relationships instead of things. Remember all the Christmas seasons of the past where you tried to do more than you were capable of doing and ended up exhausted? Matthew 11:30 sums up the pressure for doing more each Christmas by saying, “My yoke is easy and my burden is light.” Is this the way you could describe your Christmases in the past? Instead of thinking what you can add to Christmas this year, think about what you can leave out.
Whatever state you find yourself in this Christmas season, God can give you moments of joy and appreciation by having a personal relationship with him. The word of God confirms this in Isaiah 9:6 when it says, “For unto you a child is born, unto you a child is given; and the government shall be upon his shoulders and His name shall be called Wonderful, Counselor, The Mighty God. The Everlasting Father, the Prince of Peace for you.”
Every day has something good in it if you have a saving relationship with Jesus.
We: In closing, listen closely to the words of this poem called “If You Look for Me at Christmas” for the key to a special Christmas this year…
If you look for me at Christmas,
you won’t need a special star—
I’m no longer just in Bethlehem,
I’m right here where you are.
You may not be aware of me
amid the celebrations –
You’ll have to look beyond the stores
and all the decorations
But if you take a moment
from your list of things to do
And listen to your heart, you’ll find
I’m waiting there for you.
You’re the one I want to be with,
you’re the reason that I came
And you’ll find me in the stillness
as I’m whispering your name.
Put Jesus at the center of your Christmas season and you will have a wonderful Christmas!